Sometimes life isn’t fair, and sometimes we make bad decisions. Well, I have made some bad decisions. I have let my drive to change the world and my mission to legalize cannabis take a higher priority than my faith and family….especially my wife.
I hurt her.
I hurt her badly.
It took two weeks of loneliness and isolation for me to see this. She has been reminding me of the person I was when we met: I was passionate about Jesus and wanted nothing more than for people to know Him.
Well, I want to get back to that person. Somehow, I got off track and became a monster to those closest to me. An excellent example is this blog, which has been my most read blog to date.
I look back and wonder, “What was I thinking?”
I wasn’t thinking. I got tunnel vision. I neglected everything dear to me. I am not doing this for her, but I am doing this because I love the Lord, and I don’t want to hurt people, especially those closest to me.
There is some mending to be done between me, my wife, and other family members. I used to think, “It’s just war, and war sometimes separates families.” Now I think, “KC is an idiot.”
Some of you may not know, but I have quit all illegal drugs. I will be thinning out my social media sites of cannabis, hallucinogens, and other things. It will be tough, because some of you are/were really good friends. Something that bugs me, though: good friends don’t encourage/facilitate people to leave their spouses.
Part of me feels like I was duped and listened to the wrong people. I let my priorities get all out of whack. I need to get back to my first love, which is Christ, and maybe, just maybe, He will provide the healing that is needed for me, my wife, and my family.
For those that are believers, please pray for us. We would appreciate it.
For the cannabis warriors and revolutionaries that are shocked by this, I encourage you in what you think is best. Not everyone has the same path, and I have reached the end of the line.
I wanted to change the world, and I did….I lost everything dear to me.
May God have mercy on my soul.
Wagen, over and out.