Scarborough Fair

Scarborough Fair is a medieval era amusement park located in the southern part of DFW.  My wife’s family decided to take me for the first time this last Sunday. One of the first things I noticed was the massive size of the parking lot. There are hundreds of workers and thousands, if not tens of thousands, of attendants. The workers train on their trades and their “role” in this medieval village. They are actual actors that do this sort of stuff for a living.

The food was over-priced. However, there were some unique treasures. First, I quickly found Meade and decided that I needed to drink some…and it was an excellent decision. Meade is basically water, honey, and alcohol. It goes down easy and is very refreshing — especially on a hot spring day. After grabbing a fairly boring turkey leg, I decided to go for more Meade. This time, I noticed the guy selling nuts. He was selling King’s Nuts. Now, I had my reservations for obvious reasons, but I asked around, and everyone swore they were delicious. So, I broke, and decided to buy the biggest bag! I don’t regret it. I will probably do it again next year. Heck, I might buy two.

One thing I found interesting: people that misbehave at the park can be thrown into jail, the stocks, or go before the King, which is supposed to have grave consequences. I immediately seized the opportunity to say, “I’m not going back to jail! And I’m not scared of the King!” Then my father-in-law was like, “Nobody throw anybody in the stocks or jail.” And then I stated, “They might see how fast Jen and I go Bonnie and Clyde on them.” Everyone was silent.

We kept this sort of banter alive for the walk over to the jousting. Now, I was excited about the jousting, but I had Meade, beer, and peanuts, AND they threw this colossal show! It was like watching a jousting match in A Knight’s Tale, but this was with real people, real costumes, and real horses. Oh, and real jousting! No joke! It seemed like they made it really safe, though. They really only broke lances on shields, and they crumbled kind of funny, but I could see a kid being completely raptured at the idea that it was completely real. Jen admitted that she was that little kid and that was fun!

Next, there were pictures. I was forced into it by my wench of a wife. That’s OK, because I was a pirate! RRR We took several pictures and then I waited while the family bought them printed on metal and on regular photo paper. After that, we made our way back to the car and headed home. It was a unique experience. I was even able to bring home some King’s Nuts and have them the next day. I don’t regret it. Wagen, over and out.